Using tarot’s court cards for better boundaries ⛓️

I am a recovering people pleaser. Growing up, my mom would obsess about what others thought. She assumed the neighbours were always watching, scrutinizing our every move (and every outfit).

They weren’t, but it was hard to change her mind.

Whenever I did something unexpected or out of turn, she would say, “What would people think if they knew you did that?”

She would also overlook her own needs to please everyone around her. Yes, she would secretly complain about it behind closed doors, but in the outside world she was happy to do whatever anyone needed of her.

It was hard not to let those thoughts become ingrained: It took me a long time to undo that kind of thinking.

But going into business for myself forced me to reflect on that kind of upbringing. You can’t do it all, and you quickly realize how many people want a piece of your time, attention, or intellect.

The world of tarot readings and intuitive services is a slippery place all on its own. While you will meet many amazing people in this space, you will also run into just as many energy vampires.

You have to be careful with your boundaries because it’s very easy for them to get lost here. Especially if you have a big heart and want to help.

But it’s a quick road to burnout if you’re always going over time with your sessions. Or if you say yes every time someone wants you to make an exception to your availability. Of if you’re always chasing someone for payment on their readings or classes.

I’ve had some interesting requests over the years. Like the time someone asked me if I would do a tarot reading for them at six in the morning on Christmas Day.

Or the time a party host changed the location of her event to a whole other city – only giving me a heads up the morning of.

Of course, you can yes or no to anything you want. The key is recognizing whether it’s worth it for you or not.

I give up a lot of personal time already for my business. Many of my group classes happen in the evening or on weekends, when I would usually be spending time with my family.

So I’m particular about how many commitments I take on, and am careful to balance my time accordingly. If a request feels like it’s too much, or if I’m communicating with a potential client and the demands are increasing to the point where it’s getting too complicated, I pay attention to that.

But it’s not always easy when you don’t like to say no, or you’re worried about disappointing someone.

Yet I’ve learned it’s not personal: You can’t do it all.

The same applies to any situation, professional or personal. Sometimes you just don’t have the capacity. Sometimes you have to leave time for other things in your life.

Sometimes you have to say no in order to say yes to yourself.

Boundaries are something I also see come up a lot in client readings, and in my tarot classes. It’s something so many of us struggle with.

One thing I thought would be fun to share this week is a simple spread to help you fortify your boundaries.

Using only the court cards (separate them from your pack before you begin), give them a shuffle and then pull four.

Why use the court cards in this way? Because they have a lot of power and authority: They are running kingdoms.

We all want to feel like we’re in charge of our own kingdoms. While we’re not riding around on horseback like the knights, or reigning large like the kings or queens, we all need to have some kind of control and autonomy over our lives.

And those are themes the courts can help us connect to. (And yes, this means the court cards can be interpreted as more than people.)

Once you’ve pulled your cards, arrange them in the following positions: 

Hope you give this spread a try and see what messages the courts have for you.

And if you’re interested in learning more about how to work with the tarot, check out my online courses here.

Have a great week. 

Liz